There is an awful truth that starts with a Heart Cry. The realization that you are broken. And the fear that others can see it too.

I have been told time and time again that we are ALL broken. We all fall short. I know its true. Yet I forgive others for being “human” and easily tell them just how great they really are… without granting my soul the same grace.

I have this conversation often: Grace upon Grace. Its a quote my Pastor, Matt Chandler from The Village Church, states often. I’ve turned it into a mantra of sorts for when those I love beat themselves, or even others, up. When we begin searching for the faults without love, I repeat “Grace Upon Grace”. When someone wrongs us, I remind those I love that we can give Mercy.

Grace.
Mercy.

Forgiveness.

I am not gracious to myself.
I am not merciful to my heart.
I do not forgive my broken.

Generally, I can extend these things to others. My sister had always said that I hold a grudge better than most. But that part comes in, that sin of mine, when someone I truly care about wrongs me. When I have forgiven time and time again, just to be hurt again.

Those whom I love the most, hurt me the most.

And once I have given up…
I stop Forgiving.
I stop granting Mercy.
I lack Grace.

Because I am broken, I blame others for their part in breaking me.

Because I am broken, I blame myself.

Because I am broken, I think I am undeserving.

Anyone else feel this way? Is this familar to anyone else’s soul, this heart cry of mine?

Where are the confessions of the broken? Where is the admission of failings without the attempt to make ourselves feel better?

We condemn those who try to speak to their weaknesses as looking for attention.

But shouldn’t confession be freely heard?

The idea behind confession is that it allows us to acknowledge our short-comings, and to grow from them. It is meant to be the beginning of healing. We have grown so used to tearing each other down that we stopped listneing to confessions. We one-up each others’ sins. Because they can’t possible be as broken as I am.

I’m asking for confessions. I am seeking the redemption that comes from releasing the blame. Stop blaming each other and forgive yourself. Be kind to yourself. Otherwise our sins and weaknesses will consume us.

We will remain broken because we refuse the healing. We refuse the healing because we feel undeserving. And we feel undeserving because we are broken.

Grace Upon Grace
Mercy Upon Mercy
Forgiveness.

Its time to let it go. Take a moment to release yourself from the guilt and start living again.

It will be worth it.